My mom has been visiting her brother and sister-in-law for a month. They live several states away. Her brother is in hospice care with cancer. His time is near the end. Dying with dignity is the most important course of action for him. Knowing about God and Jesus and their saving grace became important to him and he gave his heart– which is a combination of mind, spirit, and soul to them for all eternity.
Cancer takes the body and literary destroy it from within. I was helpless to watch my 300+ pound father-in-law dwindle down to 80+ pounds from gastrointestinal cancer; a part of me died with him in 1993, as it took seven years for me to regain any semblance of normalcy- we were very close as he had become a dad to me. One thing about him that changed when he was diagnosed with Cancer and accepted it as his fate in life was that he eventually went to church by himself, and gave his soul and spirit, and heart to God, He was at peace with the Lord when he died.
I have a friend who died from cancer recently, and the most important thing for her was getting closer to God and dying with her dignity intact. She wanted to be strong for her children, giving them emotional support and saying goodbye all the while being dependent on them for care. It was very difficult on everyone who knew her; her family foremost. She left beautiful cards to all the people she cared about saying a long goodbye as she chose not to have hospice in her life.
My friend chose to have a prayer and song meeting with a select few of her friends who praised God and had similar beliefs as her. They said their goodbye and listened to her stories one more time. She soon died with dignity and without any regrets.
One must have no regrets in our short life span. Make the most out of life while you are still here on earth. Be kind, be wise, share your love from your heart, and be joyous in life. It is true that we experience down times of trials or sorrows but choose to make the most out of life. Go on that trip with your spouse; don’t delay because it may cause a short inconvenience to someone else.
Take time to go on scheduled dates that build good memories with your spouse, children, and friends. Activities that can be recalled as a good reflection of times spent together. Write cards, notes, or make phone calls that have significant memory making moments. Go to holiday events together or non-events. Make your life have meaning.
Tell your children that you love them often if it is true. Tell your friends that you value your relationship with them and that they are important to you. Appreciate your employer or your landlord or anyone who has chosen to make a difference that affects your life directly. Don’t take people for granted. Die with dignity, that you have done all that you can to leave your good marks on society…. that you die without any regrets.
UPDATE:
On Jan. 17, 2023, My uncle died. His family grieves for his passing but not for the his suffering from Cancer. All we can do is focus on the good times we had when he was a vibrant well man. The sickness images of memory will always sneak in. But God has Uncle Charles in his loving arms, and Uncle Charles has a glorified body now.
My Father-in-law died from Cancer in March 1993, and his sister a few months later from Cancer. I was devastated. I was not prepared to let him go. Hospice was there for grief counseling, I missed their help. I would recommend allowing Hospice to help you say goodbye and your religious leaders and family/friends to comfort you. May God’s peace surround you during this season of life.
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