Having Epilepsy is a kick in the emotional gut. I have several types of epilepsy that are not controllable, and I have family issues. When I spent time in the hospital July 18-21st, 2022, I went back to the ER on the 29th for cluster seizures; I had 15 between the doctor’s office and in the ER and three more at home. Since then I have had multiple seizures that are partial, crying seizures, and eye seizures. Initially, the hospital thought I had a mild TIA Stroke that’s why all the testing. The hospital performed a Catscan, an MRI of my brain, an sonogram for Carotid Artery, Liver, Pancreas, Kidneys, and Echocardiogram of the heart. I have a tumor on the kidney and breast, no problem. And of course the lovely repeated blood test for my Diabetes with urine tests.
Now on to the emotional toll. My husband is so frustrated! He is helpless to prevent or stop my seizures, all he can do is watch me go through them. In his frustration he tells me to “snap out of it” he thinks I can stop it or control them. It hurts his male ego of being my protector and in his way of handling seizures; he gives me the silent and avoidance treatment which breaks my heart. All I can do is try to minimize the triggers that may cause them. One support person is my younger daughter. She has researched many forms of epilepsy and understands how it affects people.
I have discovered that talking really loud in an emotional setting (yelling at me) or loud noises/sound can startle me, eye blinking or rapid strobe/flashing lights, waggling finger or stemming, and other causes of anxiety can bring on a partial seizure. Also, enjoying myself at a party or in a conversation with someone I like can bring on a “fast and furious (20 sec) seizure also.
See The Epilepsy Foundation website for more information. There are medications that work to stop them before or after they occur most of the time but no cure. Some people have said that having a seizure are selective attention-seeking moment. As if the person having a seizure is actually doing it purposefully. There are enough hypochondriacs in life or those who seek attention from a medical crisis. However, I’m neither. I have too much living to do and it is irritating to me. Epilepsy- I’m too busy for you!
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